05 Oct

Body at Rest

My September was bifurcated into extremes – one half filled with action and the other with reaction.

The first two weeks of the month were occupied by the Granite Games, which meant multiple CrossFit classes per week, one-on-one sessions with my coach to drill my Oly form  and even a visit to my chiropractor.  I prepped meals to bring to lunch at work and tried to keep hydrated. I was doing everything to actively prepare for a full weekend of competition.

The two weeks (somewhat even blurring into three) after the Granite Games have been all about deloading, decompressing and basically doing nothing.  The first day after the Granite Games I was back at work but refused to stand unless I had to do. Forget my stand-up desk and my chiropractor’s advice, I wanted to just sit on my butt. The subsequent days were either occupied by client events (happy hours, Twins game, attending awards dinners), socializing (Oktoberfest, brewery tours), or cozying up in my leather chair with my feet up, a bowl of ice cream and begging out on TV.


Some blowing off steam was probably needed. I’ve been working 60+ hours per week at work for the past year and the whole summer was hitting the gym more than usual for me. The stress of the Granite Games and major work projects all came crashing together and my body was happy to be at rest. It hit me like a ton of bricks how tired I was. I could see other people from my gym who had competed via Facebook and Instagram were back at it after a week off.  I barely wanted to move a finger.


The fact is that despite all my time in the gym training for the Granite Games, I wasn’t holistically taking care of myself. I wasn’t eating as clean as I should have, I wasn’t drinking enough water and I was certainly not sleeping enough.

Now the last three weeks have felt like a total regression. I was drinking more than usual. I was allowing myself plenty of cheat meals. I gained weight. And I had made my way into the gym a whopping total of four times in 20 days.

This past Saturday morning, we did a partner WOD at CrossFit Kingfield that involved 10 dumbbell thrusters, 30 feet of walking lunges with dumbbells and 10 hand release push-ups. We switched on and off for 12-minutes and despite the rest the WOD totally kicked my butt. I felt like I had lost my strength and my endurance in just three short weeks.

Now it’s time to do better.  I’m figuring out exactly what my weekly training will look like but I realize that I have to be a lot more disciplined about life outside the gym:

1.) Water – My goal is 1 gallon of water per day. I am using the Water Logged app on my iPhone to track my intake. It helps me get in the right habit and reminds me to keep sipping water throughout the day. On Saturday night I even took a full water bottle with me to a friend’s BBQ. I happily avoided the sugary apple cider since I had my water with me the whole time.

2.) Sleep – 8 hours is the new rule. To encourage that I am getting off the computer and the TV by 9:30pm. That means I am laying down by 10pm and if I am not 100% ready to doze off, well I have a big stack of books that I accumulated over the summer that I can start making my way through.

3.) Mobility – My foam roller is now going to living on the floor in front of my TV.  No more hiding it in the closet and thinking that I can get away with not stretching and rolling out. I am also getting back to yoga. I had been going once per week and in the last month or so it has completely fallen off the to-do list. There is a yoga studio just two blocks from my house and I am going on Tuesday to check it out and am going to fold it back into the routine.

This stuff is nothing new or revolutionary, but I was struck by a recent article on Barbell Shrugged by Kyle Smith who started it by writing, “The key to optimal performance is mastering and maintaining the fundamentals daily.” 

He goes on to say, “There’s no point in training hard if you don’t sleep. None of that secondary stuff will matter. The very same thing is true for hydration.”

My body was speaking to me. It needed a break, but it also needed me to take better care of it so that my recovery time wasn’t so dramatic.

More sleep. More water. More gains.

16 Sep

Granite Games Recap – Day 3

Thanks to an athlete briefing being scheduled at 6:30AM, we were all up bright and early on the last day of the Granite Games. No one was moving very quickly but we dragged ourselves over to field house at St. Cloud State University and immediately after it finished went right back to the hotel. We had breakfast, packed our bags and watched “Jeers of 2015…So Far” on ESPN. Laughing at all these sports bloopers put us all in a good mood for the morning and we were anxious to start the day’s events.



  • 60ft Front Rack Axle (105#) Lunge Walk
  • 45 Axle Shoulder to Overhead (105#)
  • 45 Pull Ups
  • 45 Axle Shoulder to Overhead (105#)
  • 60ft Front Rack Axle Lunge Walk (105#)

Rules: Waterfall will start with the team on the starting mat. At the sound of the beep, 1 athlete will begin to lunge the axle bar forward. Once the team has lunged 60 ft. they will begin on their shoulder to overhead. They will continue through the rep scheme down the waterfall and then back. Time will be called when the athlete who is lunging the axle crosses the finish line.  For this workout, athletes will be allowed to rotated as needed. Time cap: 10 minutes.

Our team hauled ass in this workout. The fact that we came in 29th just tells you what a difference it makes for the teams that are more comfortable with the weight in the workout and can do the shoulder to overhead movement at 105 pounds with ease.

I started us off with the front rack lunge walk. Rather than a regular barbell, we had to use an axle, which is wider and allows for less grip.  Originally I had thought I would switch off with Nick halfway through; however, Chris thankfully told me right before the clock started to go the whole way. That clear instruction and the fact that he had the confidence in me to handle the task for the team was the motivation I needed and I did the whole 60 feet.

We then split the shoulder to overheads into sets of five. Nick was able to string some bigger sets together which helped us keep up the pace. Chris went first on the pull-ups and just went to town and did about 18 or so.  We had originally planned for him to do 15, me to do 10 and Nick to do 20.  In the heat of the battle, I went next and did about 13-14. Nick had to listen for the judge to know when to stop since we had changed up the rep scheme so much. It was then back to the shoulder to overheads and then Chris took the charge with the remaining lunges. Despite his knee bothering him all weekend, he just got it done.


12010755_764200527024482_6079889575851557742_o (2)

Results: 05:12 / 10:00
Place: 29th out of 43

11951540_764202513690950_8129713921887111720_oEVENT 9 – OVER THE HILL

Complete as many rounds and reps as possible in 16 minutes of:

  • Row 80 Calories
  • 40 Burpee Box Jumps, 24-inch
  • 60 Sandbag Ground-To-Shoulder  70 lb.
  • 40 Burpee Box Jumps, 24-inch

Rules: Over The Hill will start with the team on the starting mat. At the sound of the beep, 1 athlete will begin rowing for calories. For this workout, athletes will be allowed to rotate as needed. Once the team has finished their required calories they will progress to their burpee box jumps. The Scaled division will be allowed to perform steps-up however, AsRx and Intermediate will be required to jump. Once the team has finished their burpee box jumps they progress forward to the sandbag. They will follow the Over The Hill rep scheme until time is called at the 16 minute mark. Every rep counts in this workout. Credit will be given for partially completed rounds.

12000942_764202547024280_2894048853789016881_o (2)

If there was ever a time to go into beast mode, this was it. We had practiced the sandbag ground to shoulder movement and the burpee box jump-overs in the athlete warm-up area, but any practice and training over the past few months was irrelevant. Whatever we planned to do went out the window. It was go full force or go home.

It was ironic that I was laughing at all the sports blunders that moment since when it came to the second set of burpee box jump overs I would have made the highlight reel. I’m not sure what number rep I was on, but suddenly I completely fell over the box. I scraped my shins and was bleeding and the judge yelled, “No rep!” I was in a moment of disbelief at what just happened, but quickly got up and started a new rep. But then I tripped on the box  and was flat on my face again. This time the judge gave us the rep. I think she realized that even though I fell, I had gotten over the box.  The medical team who was sitting right near us looked at my bleeding legs with concern but I made sure they knew it was just a flesh wound.  Our team continued forward.  However, I was not done yet and when it was my turn again I did a rep where I just completely knocked over the box.  The judge did not know what to do with me and the announcer even made mention of the craziness. I am tempted to get a subscription to Flo Elite just to watch the video of the event and see if they caught any of it on tape.

We were very excited with how far we got through the workout in the time cap.  Personally, I was beaming as the head judge told me I did a great job with the sandbag and that my form was really efficient.  With my shins both bleeding, I stopped by the medical team. They cleaned up the wounds and asked if I wanted a bandage. I assumed I would get like a G.I. Joe band-aid but suddenly there was gauze and bandages being wrapped around making my injuries seem quite dramatic.  A nice visual at least that I had given it my all, especially as I saw the one medical team member wiping off the box to make sure it didn’t have any blood on it.

Results: 1 round + 110 reps
Place: 20th out of 43


At the end of the competition, we finished in 19th place. For a team that had only trained together twice and had only been in communication for a week, we were thrilled. Nick and Chris were great teammates as they were both calm throughout the weekend and very supportive. They did not let me dwell on any mistakes or feel like I wasn’t carrying my weight. It was also great having my coaches at CrossFit Kingfield up at the Granite Games competing themselves and offering needed advice and fist bumps throughout the weekend.

It was a very long weekend. I was asked throughout if I was having fun. I wasn’t able to muster a “Yes” most of the time. I was tired, I was disappointed with my performance in many of the events, and I wasn’t sure the world of CrossFit competitions was where I was meant to be.

The last day was the best day by far. I felt that in those last two events I had truly given it my all (and not just because I had some bruises to show for it). I really felt on the Sunday that I went beyond what I expected from myself. I was confident in my abilities. I was demonstrating my value.

In general, I am probably way too hard on myself. I don’t take competing lightly. It is not just something to do. For me, the competition had great meaning and so I have a lot of mixed feelings.  On Monday, I was asked my friend if I was just going to take a break or if I was done. I really don’t know what is next. I have come so far in the last two years in and out of the gym. But I have this nagging feeling I can still try harder and that I can do better.

15 Sep

Granite Games Recap – Day 2

I  can’t say any of us got our beauty rest at the Motel 6. The room was too hot and then it was too cold. Chris was suffering from an achy knee and a cold. Everyone was a little creaky and coughing and generally a bit tired when we got up and dragged ourselves to the athlete briefing at 7:30 AM.

With that said as the first event of the day approached and we got some food in our stomachs and stretched and warmed up, the group started to come alive. The weather was awesome and we had a lot of work ahead of us to conquer.


For time: Handstand walk 120 ft.

Rules: Handstands will start with the team on the starting mat. At the sound of the beep, 1 of 3 athletes kicks up and handstand walks. The team will progress 60ft down the floor and will be able to change out athletes at any time. Once they have reach the end of the 60ft lane, they will turn around and progress back to the finishing line. Time cap: 2 Minutes. After the 2-minute time cap, the teams will have 90 seconds to move to their starting mat for Event 4.

At the morning briefing we were informed that you had to go 10 feet unbroken at a time for the scoring. Chris and I can kinda maybe sorta do handstand walks. We can definitely NOT do 10 feet unbroken. Our best laid plans were to have Nick do the event alone and us just clap and cheer from him as he went.

Nick took it all in stride and made his way up and down our lane. We thought he killed it and he really did. He took 9th place out of the field of 43 teams. Total ninja!

Results: 01:32 / 02:00
Place: 9th out of 43 

gg day 2 - 1


9 Round for time of:

  • 9 Hang Snatch (95#)
  • 9 Toes-to-bar

Rules: Nine Lives will start with the team on the starting mat. At the sound of the beep, 1 athlete will begin performing toes-to-bar. Once they have finished their required number (9) they will move to the barbell and begin their hang snatches (9). Teams will be able to change athletes after the completion of a full round. No substitutions will be allowed in the middle of a round. Teams are not required to make substitutions and athletes may complete back to back rounds. The team as whole must complete a total of nine rounds. The athlete who finishes the ninth round of hang snatches will then move to the finishing mat where time will be called. Time cap: 12 minutes.

I consistently trained over the summer but didn’t consistently train all the movements as much as I really could have (i.e. see double-unders on Day 1). However, I did a lot of work on my technique for the snatch. I worked with Coach Chris from CrossFit Kingfield one-on-one and while it is not perfect it is much improved. The nine hang snatches at 95 lbs was a challenging but with enough aggression and fast elbows I made it happen.

What got me were the toes-to-bar. I had practiced with Coach Caitlin and Coach Amanda the weekend before and seemed to get the kipping movement down but it was clearly not ingrained yet as it fell apart in the workout.  We each took a round for sets 1-6, but I couldn’t string my toes-to-bar and was getting flummoxed. I had Nick do my third set so that our team could keep moving. If we wanted to win, it was time to set ego aside and let my teammates step in where I needed help.

gg day 2 - 3

Results: 07:59 / 12:00
Place: 19th out of 43


1-rep-max Clean

Rules: Clean will be scored as the sum of the heaviest lifts by the members. Time cap: 2:30 per athlete.

This event was by far the most chaotic of them all. The judges told us a minute before heading out to the arena that the first athlete would be given a minute to load the bar – that was me. Further, there would be an air horn announcing the start of the minute and another horn for the start of the time allowed to lift and another when it was time to switch. The judges were not at our lane when the horn went off, which was different from past events. Rather, they all suddenly ran out onto the arena floor while I was loading the bar. It was crazy. There was a ton of noise with the clanking of bars and weights and the audience cheering and the music and the loud announcers.

The team’s score was each individual’s best lift added together. My plan was to open with 145# to make sure I got a number on the board. In the whirlwind of activity, I loaded the bar up to 155# without noticing. I successfully did the clean. I then went up by 10 pounds thinking I was going for 155# when in reality it was 165#. I missed the rep and suddenly realized why it felt so heavy. I dropped down to 160# and hit that. And then tried 165# again and was successful. Finally I tried 170# but missed.

With a few seconds left, I started loading the bar for Chris. He ended up hitting 195#. Nick followed after and his best lift was 235#. We knew going out onto the floor that this event was not going to be our best. There were a lot of teams with bigger beastly guys who were all hitting over 200#. We could out run them, but we couldn’t out lift them.

Results:  595 lbs
Place: 31st out of 43



For time:

  • Ski (1,000 meters)
  • Assault Air Bike (4,000 meters)
  • Run (1,500 meters)

Rules: Ski Sprint will end at the respective meter (2000m/1500m/1000m) checkpoint. Teams will receive points based on their times at this point. There is no scheduled rest at the checkpoint as the race continues.

Minnesota Triathlon will be scored by the total time to finish the entire Triathlon. Finishing order at the Ski Sprint will have no bearing on the scoring for Minnesota Triathlon.

  • Ski – Athlete 1 & Athlete 2
  • Bike – Athlete 2 & Athlete 3
  • Run – Athlete 1 & Athlete 3

Athlete 1 & 2 will perform Event 6. The event begins with both athletes alternating on the ski erg until they have met the required meters. Once they finish, Athlete 2 will progress to the bike where they are met by Athlete 3 and start alternating on the bike. They will ride until they have met the required meters or the 20 minute cap.  They are allowed to switch at anytime but, only one athlete can work at a time. After they finish the bike, Athlete 1 & 3 will begin their partner run together. The event will end when both athletes have crossed the finish line. Event 6 and Event 7 are two separate scored workouts. Time cap: 20 Minute caps will be set for all teams to be finished with the Bike.

Outside in the warm September air, we huddled anxiously waiting for the last event of the day. Chris was feeling good about his knee and so he would be Athlete 1, tackling the ski erg and the run. I was going to be our designated Athlete 2, doing the ski erg and the bike. And Nick would be Athlete 3, handling the bike and run. Nick got probably the worst assignment as going from the bike into the run was brutal. The air assault bikes just hit your quads right away due to the fact that the seat is tilted slightly forward.

We all put in a good effort and Chris and Nick sprinted across the finish line, passing a team right at the end. They both had to hold onto a rope and actually almost clotheslined a guy in front of them, which would have been epic. But they nicely ran around him.

Results: 03:24
Place: 24th out of 43

Results: 17:30
Place: 18th out of 43


Day 2 finished with dinner at Nick’s on the 3rd Floor in downtown St. Cloud. The restaurant was busier than the staff expected and it was a long wait that made the food taste even better when it finally arrived. I had a burger and a great big plate of sweet potato fries.

With a belly full, we relaxed back at the motel watching “Ferrell Takes the Field” on the complimentary HBO.  We hit the hay early as the final events were in our sights and we were now sitting in 18th place. We wanted to finish in the top twenty and we had some work ahead of us to make sure we maintained our spot.

14 Sep

Granite Games Recap – Day 1

Over three long days, I competed in the Granite Games in St. Cloud, Minnesota with Team Diacachimba in the Men’s Open Scaled Division. It was a team of three that included myself, my friend Nick who I met through Power Monkey Camp and our culinary adventure to Nicaragua with Paleo Nick, and Chris, one of the owners of CrossFit Sabertooth.

Chris stepped in at the last minute a week before the competition. As a team, we met only twice to train together. Nevertheless, we were ready to give it our all and see what we could accomplish.  So with the car packed with coolers and foam rollers and gym bags and lawn chairs, we hit the road at 6am to get to St. Cloud State University, where the games were being held for an early-morning check-in and the first athlete briefing.

The Granite Games have grown significantly over the last few years. There were 1,200 athletes this weekend, with countless volunteers and judges helping us all navigate our way through the nine events.  It was quite the scene at the athlete camp where everyone had set up tents and blankets and chairs. We set up shop with the teams from my gym – CrossFit Kingfield.  Thankfully, the sun shone all weekend (a little too much for my pale skin, specifically my exposed arms) and it was nice to be in the fresh air between events.

Nick is an expert chef and prepped meals for us. An egg bake with sausage and plaintains hit the spot each morning. The other meals were perfectly grilled steak and chicken with sweet potato mash. Nick likes to fuel his engine with clean food and it was a great alternative to relying upon the burgers and brats for sale or hitting up the nearby fast food chains for sustenance.

After a long wait in the morning and a good warm-up session in the practice area, Team Diacachimba was ready to go!



  • Athlete 1 2 Rounds for time of: 50 Double Under + 10 Overhead Squats
  • Athlete 2: 50 Double Under + 10 Overhead Squats + 50 Double Under + 20 Front Squats
  • Athlete 3 : 50 Double Under + 20 Front Squats + 50 Double Under + 20 Front Squats

Rules: Doubles & Squat will begin with Athlete 1 moving through double unders (50) and overhead squats (115#). Once they finished their two rounds, they will sprint to the finishing mat and Athlete 2 will start their portion of the workout. Once they have finished their double unders and squats, they will sprint to the finishing mat and Athlete 3 will begin. The workout will end when Athlete 3 finishes their last front squat and then crosses the finishing line.  Time cap: 12 minutes.


The first event made it clear this weekend was going to be tough. We set Nick off first as he was the strongest in the overhead squats and double-unders. The man is very cool under pressure and lives up to his nickname from Nicaragua of “Nick Zen”.  Chris went next, and despite tweaking his knee during our training sessions just two days before, he was strong on the overheads and front squats.  I went last and had a good start with the double-unders. The front squats though knocked the wind out of me. When it was time for my second set of double-unders, I had lost my breathe, my shoe came untied and I had a hard time focusing with all the noise and activity and rush as the clock ticked down.

I was very disappointed in my performance in this first showing. It hit me quickly the difference between competing as an individual versus a team, as I felt that I had let down Chris and Nick by fumbling with the double-unders. They were extremely supportive and encouraging throughout the weekend and didn’t allow me to dwell on my mistakes or that I was holding the team back. Still it’s hard to think you are not pulling your weight.

Result: Finished 368/390 reps in 12-minute time cap
Place: 18th out of 43


EVENT 2 – 40/30/20/10

  • 40 Partner Deadlifts
  • 10 Handstand Push Ups with Handstand Hold
  • 30 Partner Deadlifts
  • 10 Handstand Push Ups with Handstand Hold
  • 20 Partner Deadlifts
  • 10 Handstand Push Ups with Handstand Hold

Rules: This event begins with all three teammates on the starting mat. At the sound of the beep, the first pair will move to the barbell for partner deadlifts (405#). After the deadlifts, the pair will move to the rig. One athlete will then hold a handstand against the wall while the second athlete performs their reps of handstand push-ups. The team will be able to tag out an athlete at anytime during this event. The event is complete when they complete  all their reps and move to the finish mat. Time cap: 15 minutes.

Going into the afternoon, I was nervous about the handstand holds. I had gotten out of the habit of kicking up into a handstand hold position and during the last few weeks at the gym, whenever it came up in a workout, I found myself landing with my head on the ground and having to do a handstand push-up. That was not going to save us any time, which we desperately needed to do. I ran into Thuy from CrossFit Fargo who was a judge for the weekend and inquired about whether I could do a wall walk to get into position. She was awesome and found out right away that was allowed. With a back-up plan in mind, I decided with the extra time on my hands to go practice my kick-up. Knowing that it would was key to us moving quickly and how I could best contribute, I just forced myself to get out of my head and do it.  And I did! Again and again. I did at least a dozen to make sure it wasn’t a lark. Whatever was holding me back at the gym was now gone.

I felt good going into the event. We had come up with a system of switching in and out on the partner deadlifts. It required a lot of clear communication in the heat of the moment, but we were able to execute. Nick tackled all the handstand push-ups like a ninja. I did all the handstand holds. I was a bit overzealous perhaps on my first one as I got up in position and somehow slipped off the plexiglass and underneath the rig. I shook it off and got right back at it.  We finished the event a lot faster than we anticipated.

Results: 05:43 / 15:00
Place: 12th out of 43


At the end of Day 1, we were in 14th place overall and clearly all smiles. Our team was getting along well and we rocked some Power Monkey Camp shirts as that is where Nick and I first met. (Plus Nick had an extra that Chris could wear so we could have a pseudo team uniform. )  Before passing out for the night at our luxurious room at the Motel 6 in nearby Waite Park, we watched the pro athletes take on legless rope climbs and sandbag carries. It was amazing to see their strength and endurance and it was really nice to do so sitting down.

03 Sep

Do I Need a Contest to be a Winner?

“The battles that count aren’t the ones for gold medals. The struggles within yourself – the invisible, inevitable battles inside all of us – that’s where it’s at.” – Jessie Owens

On Tuesday afternoon I found out that my teammate Jarrod was dropping out of the Granite Games.  It was decision that he made with a heavy heart but was the right one due to issues at work.  Our other teammate Nick and I were supportive, though admittedly frustrated as we were just 10 days away from the competition.

Immediately I started scrambling to find a replacement. I took out a notepad and made a list of my friends from Solcana CrossFit, TwinTown CrossFit, CrossFit Kingfield and elsewhere that I thought would be good substitutes. Mind you, I had gone through a similar process back in late June when I found out that my friend Ryan would not be part of the team the night before registration. I sent emails and texts and Facebook messages. I talked with my coaches and tried to turn around the situation.

Twenty-fours hours later I had come up short. I went to class, despite not being in the mood, so that I could see if there was someone from Kingfield that I could connect with or if my coaches had any new ideas. Whenever I could, whether it was during a water break or putting on my lifting shoes, I was checking my phone to see if anyone had responded.

So there I was doing a snatch complex and thinking through what had just happened. With only one week to go, it seemed like finding a new teammate and being ready to fight through three days of handstand walks, partner deadlifts, ski ergs and air dynes was near impossible. How would we communicate if we had barely talked before the competition? How would we be able to muster up the camaraderie and support for each other if we were complete strangers? Was I going to have to drop out? Had I built up the Games too much? Was I making a mountain out of a mole hill?

Then it was time for “Helen”.  After 15 minutes of lifting and being in my head, I was fried. As the others got ready for the main workout, I said to Coach Amanda, “Would it offend you if I skipped the WOD and just went home?” She asked if I was okay and I explained with a tremble in my voice that I was really distracted and angry and that the thought of swinging kettlebells and doing pull-ups seemed like a recipe for disaster. Either I was going to get hurt or I was going to have a complete mental breakdown. My gut instinct told me to leave the gym and try to calm down.  And I did just that. I made myself some waffles and watched an episode of Fargo.

Why did I sign up with a team? Should I have just competed alone? Was I in over my head anyways? What would people think if I didn’t compete? Or did people even care if I was competing in the first place? My parents didn’t seem to get it, neither did my coworkers. Why was I doing this competition? Was it going to prove anything?

As a million thoughts ran through my mind, one broke through the noise: “You don’t need to compete to be a winner.” 

For the last two years I have been writing about how I need to compete and that I need to take risks and not be a pushover and be more aggressive. In truth, what I was really saying was that I needed to find my self-confidence. I’ve been completely misguided in thinking that all this training was going to lead to me stepping up onto a podium and suddenly being sure of myself – that I needed a medal around my neck or trophy on my mantel to make me feel like I finally could stand on my own two feet.

Competing was not my goat – confidence was. And yet over the last two years, I have made leaps and bounds. Training to compete was the catalyst for the change I needed in my life. Thanks to that focus, I put myself out there and showed up in Tennessee for CrossFit camp to train along Games athletes and arrived in Nicaragua to spend 10 days with a group of strangers. I went after the job I wanted and am now running around town selling properties and leasing spaces and finding my name in the paper and up on listing signs on the highway and in front of the Cathedral. I was putting myself out there and I was taking other risks in life, from the little, like trying gymnastic classes and yoga poses on paddle boards, to the big, like buying my first home.

“As for you, my fine friend — you’re a victim of disorganized thinking. You are under the unfortunate delusion that simply because you run away from danger, you have no courage. You’re confusing courage with wisdom. Back where I come from, we have men who are called heroes. Once a year, they take their fortitude out of mothballs and parade it down the main street of the city. And they have no more courage than you have. But! They have one thing that you haven’t got! A medal!” – The Wizard, THE WIZARD OF OZ

So I still don’t have a teammate figured out and I’m not sure if I am going to do the Granite Games. That will all get resolved. But more importantly, this momentary crisis has brought great clarity as I move forward. I don’t have it all figured out, but I realize now that I don’t need to compete to win. I just need to start accepting that I am a winner.